How to Self-Care When Self-Care Feels Hard

Self-care can feel especially tough when we're feeling overwhelmed or experiencing stress, burnout, a recent loss, depression, or anxiety. We can know that self-care can help us feel better, yet sometimes it can feel so out of reach. 

Tiny steps can make a big difference. The following components are all important to our day-to-day functioning and self-care, starting with taking care of our physical bodies. Listed with these are small ideas to help lift our mood quickly, starting with what may be easiest. It may be worth trying something from list and checking in with yourself to see how you feel after; you might be surprised by how even small changes can make a difference: 

• Movement – stretching, even if we're lying down and aren't ready to get up yet, or changing what position we’re in, or going for a short walk, even to the kitchen for a drink or snack. 

• Hydration – drinking a glass of water, a hot or cold beverage, or something with supplements or electrolytes. 

• Nourishment – eating food that feels good for you, like a snack, or ordering or preparing a meal. 

• Hygiene – something to help you feel more clean, like washing your face, changing clothes, brushing your teeth, or taking a shower or bath. 

• Environment – letting some fresh air in through a window, lighting a candle, tidying up one area for a minute or two. 

• Sleep – taking a nap, playing white noise, soothing music, or an audiobook to help calm your mind enough to rest. 

• Connection with others – calling a loved one, engaging with an in-person or online community. 

• Something you enjoy – could be engaging with something that interests you, like reading, listening to a podcast, playing a video game, or watching a favourite show, a hobby or skill, like drawing, writing, or playing music. 

• Any additional needs – this could be taking any prescription medications as needed, a break from screens, spending time outdoors in nature, snuggling with a pet, or reaching out for extra support like a crisis line or counselling. Check in with yourself and what you specifically need. 

Everyone's unique, and what we need moment-to-moment can change. Tuning into what we need, and doing even one small thing for ourselves, can make a positive difference. 

If you need immediate support, visit our Resources page for crisis supports that are available 24/7, and for other mental health resources. 

References: 

DBT Tools (2024). ABC PLEASE Skill. https://dbt.tools/emotional_regulation/abc-please.php 

Harr, J. (n.d.). You Feel Like Shit: An Interactive Self-Care Guide. https://philome.la/jace_harr/you-feel-like-shit-an-interactive-self-care-guide/play/index.html 

National Institute of Mental Health (2024). Caring For Your Mental Health. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health